happy earth day from the princess and the pea

I am not a nature lover. A tree-hugger yes, but feel-the-grass-under-my-feet as I sweat on the hiking trail girl, never. I love that nature exists, I want to protect it, I just don't enjoy sleeping and eating in it. My idea of a nice day outside includes cement and a swimming pool.

So, when we invited ourselves to our friends camping trip (in the rain), I immediately sent Randy to the sporting goods store on a mission - find something I can sleep on that will feel like my bed. And this is what he found:


Do the cots look like my bed because Wally is jumping on them?

As we were leaving, I was mocked for my camping attire - full face of makeup, open toed shoes (I have to say in my defense I had removed my heels!!), and "not camping" clothes (not sure still what camping clothes are).

The rain didn't really bother me, nor did the dirt in the tent. What did get to me was the natural disasters I foresaw - children falling into the fire, getting lost in the woods, or dragged out of the tent by a bear (I don't believe there really are any bears where we were, but a red-neck fills just fine in my scenario). Doesn't this look dangerous?




As Randy zipped us into the tent (don't even get me started on the issue of being zipped inside of something), I was in for the longest night of my life. Comfy as the cot was, and loud as Randy's rhythmic snores were, they were no contest to the sounds of nature which amplified for my full hearing pleasure in the tent. I heard squeaks I assumed were mice running rampant through the camp, chewing their way into our snack-packed rubbermaid tubs through the sealed bags and into the mainstay of life - the Fritos. I heard flits against the tent, certain they were bugs of every kind, there to crawl into my sleeping bag to give me a big case of the jitters (not surewhat else bugs actually do, but I am terrified of them!). My imagination had the best of me, and with nothing more than a couple of zippers and layers of nylon between me and nature, I could not sleep.

Just as the sun peeked its way into the tent, I could hear the restless stirring of boys fighting to be awake, only now I was finally asleep. And now, it was time for breakfast.

My loss of sleep was my children's gain in junkfood, for the next day I needed all the sugar and caffeine possible to keep myself going. And, as evidenced by the Macon Telegraph photojournalist who took the pic below, I shared the sugar - Stevie and my friend's daughters are eating ice cream under a tree at the Cherry Blossom Festival: